Many people after breaking up
don't know what to do. They feel lonely, they want their ex back,
but don't know how to go about it.
Often times we fall back on the
old adage "time heals all wounds." We will then wait weeks
or months and hope our ex forgives us enough to
want us back. Unfortunately, this usually just causes further heartbreak.
In the weeks or months that you
are apart, your ex can move on. They can find someone else.
They may even figure you don't care enough to go after them and just
give up on you, even if they were thinking about taking you back.
So often times one of the best
strategies is to learn some Relationship Intelligence and aim to get
your ex back in just days.
Here is a 3
step method for getting your ex back within just a few days.
Step One: figure out why the relationship ended. Try to
figure this out as objectively as possible. What caused the break up? If
there was a big fight at the end, what was the underlying reason as best
you understand it that you split up?
Relationships will end for one of three main reasons. You wronged them
in some significant way. They wronged you. Or, they lost their interest
in and passion for you, you drifted apart.
Figuring out the reason why you split is the first important step.
Admitting what went wrong and being honest about it is key to repairing
the rift between you. Be as honest as you can about your part in
what went wrong. If you know what went wrong, your conversations
to repair the damage will be much more effective.
Step Two is to have a special kind of conversation with them that
focuses on how you both feel rather than on blaming and arguing. You
want to make it clear in the beginning of this conversation that you
aren't going to attack and blame, and they don't need to justify or
explain. That you just want them to listen and be listened to. So, for
example, if you cheated on them, you need to let them vent about their
feelings about what you did, and you need to make them feel heard. (This
step doesn't apply to Relationship Drift, you have to do something
different.)
If you can both talk about your feelings about what went wrong, not get
into blaming and arguing, then there is hope. The negative feelings you
both have may need to be aired in a safe environment where you agree
beforehand not to scream or make the other person wrong.
It may seem hard to comprehend
that you can talk about issues without screaming and fighting, but it
can be done if you set the stage correctly.
Step Three is discretionary. You have to go by gut instinct how
well step two went. If feelings got vented and aired sufficiently, then
you can give or accept an apology. This paves the way to discuss getting
your ex back.
If they are still angry, you can give them more
time. If they seem interested, you can start to talk to them about
it.
You don't need to demand or pressure your mate to get back together or
make a big decision. You need to let them know you are interested in
seeing them again and ask them to consider that. Leaving the ball in
their court is often the best practice at this stage.
There is a lot
more to this, but following these three steps can begin to repair your
love relationship and pave the way for reconnecting without waiting
weeks and just hoping they want you back. If you want support
getting your ex back in simple but proven steps, you can check out a
complete 7 Step Strategy here at
Get
Your Love Back Now.
